Day 3: The True Pain

Day 3 on the No Nicotine Fundraiser where, they tell me, the rubber meets the road so far as withdrawal. This is supposed to be the Dark Day, and the final day. After 48 hours there is no nicotine in your system, and so your body craves it all that much more…but after this it’s suppose to get easier.

Day 3 is brought to you, as were Days 1 and 2 (and that little snippet on the 19th that doesn’t really count) by Susan Bedard.

Let me say this as politely as I can.

The Smoking Cessation industrial complex is brilliant. They have the entire nation, top to bottom, convinced that quitting smoking is the single hardest thing you’ve ever done. Harder than birthing a baby, harder than making Richard III sympathetic, harder than trying to explain to non-Americans that we didn’t all vote for imperialistic capitalism. BUT they will sell you something that will make it easier. And if you don’t make it this time, they’ll be right here to help you next time, and the time after that. What a friggen scam.

Aside from the neck tension, and jaw tension, and the stunning realization that my car smells very much like a 1970’s tobacconist’s – especially in the seasonal 70 degree weather. The only consequences have been psychological.

I used smoking as punctuation, and reflection.

On waking and sleeping, on setting out and returning, and as dessert for any meal. It was also my time killer of choice while sitting outside and talking for hours and hours.

So aside from losing my punctuation (which is disorienting) and something to do with my hands while I harangue who ever gets stuck at my house… nothing really.

Until I got bored. See. Saturdays are sit around days. I built them that way on purpose. Read a magazine and smoke. Play a half of Madden on the PlayStation – smoke. If you tack 10 minutes (two cigarettes) onto any activity, the days are just packed.

Take those away? THAT will make you peel your face off.

So the Smoking Cessation industrial complex is absolutely right… America is screwed… because we are all SO bored with our lives that quitting is impossible.

So I’m thinking that I’ll:

  1. Finish the grant application budget.
  2. Write another blog entry or three
  3. send my Christmas Cards
  4. Go Christmas Shopping
  5. Go get branches or a bench for Sleeping Beauty and Rapunzel at First Night.
  6. Walk (not smoking WILL make you eat…)
  7. Make sure Will gets the video for First Night so he can get it formatted for First Night.
  8. Watch Squid and the Whale
  9. Make another pot of coffee
  10. Write a cover letter and exhibit list for the grant application.

I’m sure there are other things to get through… but I’m only killing the one day.

And I do need to call today’s sponsor. She rocks.